Bedroom Song
Navigating Heartbreak in the City: Aggie Miller's Bedroom Reflections
Lyrics
I'm back in the city I was raised by
I return to the city where I grew up
I don't know who to talk to or how to act
I feel lost, unsure of who to confide in or how to behave
I can't ignore a clock ticking violently
I can't ignore the passing of time, marked by a ticking clock
Pass out in bedrooms I swore I'd leave in my past
I find myself unconscious in bedrooms I promised to leave behind
I'm an adult now
I've reached adulthood
I know less than I ever have
Despite growing older, I feel more ignorant than ever
Old loves are moved on now
Past loves have moved on
Finally feel the heartbreak I never let myself have
I finally allow myself to experience the heartbreak I avoided
I would get high in the bathroom
I used to get high in the bathroom
Sink and wish the door was kicked in
Sinking in despair, wishing for a forceful entrance
Asking for forgiveness, missing asking for permission
Regretting actions, both seeking forgiveness and avoiding permission
I would have done so much differently
I reflect on what I could have done differently
I would have done so much differently
Reiteration of the desire to change past actions
I would have let you in when you wanted to
Expressing regret for not allowing someone in when they wanted
The wind is howling louder than I ever said I wanted you
The external noise is louder than my expressed desire for you
But I wanted you
Despite the external factors, I did want you
Could've tried harder
Realization that more effort could have been invested
Thought it was out of my hands
Believed the situation was beyond control
It was all predisposed
Acknowledging that circumstances were predetermined
I'm sorry I left it all up to you
Apology for leaving decisions to someone else
And for thinking I was born to grow old alone
Regret for assuming a future of growing old alone
I would get high in the bathroom
Repetition of getting high in the bathroom
Sink and wish the door was kicked in
Desiring an abrupt interruption, perhaps seeking attention
Asking for forgiveness, missing asking for permission
Continued theme of seeking forgiveness and avoiding permission
I would have done so much differently
Reiterating the desire for a different past
I would have done so much differently
Expressing the wish for alternative actions
I would have let you in when you wanted to
Regret for not allowing someone in when they wanted
The wind is howling louder than I ever said I wanted you
The external noise is louder than my past expressions of desire
But I wanted you
Despite the noise, the desire for the person is affirmed
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