Grow out of It
Navigating the Maze of Growing Pains with Charlie Oriain
Lyrics
I dress all my fears in camouflage
I hide my fears behind a facade, trying to conceal them
Hard to know what’s real and what is not
It's difficult to distinguish reality from illusion
Runaway to lose my train of thought
I escape to lose my focus deliberately
It always finds a way of catching up
Despite my efforts to escape, my thoughts catch up with me
Now i’m turning 23
Reaching the age of 23
Still working out who I should be
Still figuring out my identity and purpose
And I wonder if I’ll ever fit the shoes picked out for me
Questioning if I'll ever live up to others' expectations
And I thought that I’d grow out of it
Expected to outgrow these struggles
And sometimes could’ve sworn I almost did
Occasionally felt like I was overcoming these challenges
And everytime I’m starting to change
Whenever I start to evolve,
I get so close and get in my way
I sabotage my progress
What if I, I never grow out of it
Concern about not overcoming these issues
I guess there comes a point you come to terms
Accepting a certain aspect of myself
It’s just the part of me that I’m still learning
Recognizing this as an ongoing learning process
Sometimes I just wish it didn’t hurt
Wishing the growth process wasn't painful
Maybe then I’d be a different person
Speculating that without the pain, I'd be different
Still hope by 24 or 5
Hoping that by 24 or 25
I won’t be anxious all the time
Desiring to alleviate constant anxiety
Cos’ i’ve never felt so far away
Feeling emotionally distant from where I want to be in the future
To somewhere down the line
Aiming for a future version of myself
And I thought that I’d grow out of it
Expected personal growth at some point
And sometimes could’ve sworn I almost did
Experiencing glimpses of progress at times
And everytime I’m starting to change
Each time I begin to change,
I get so close and get in my way
I obstruct my own progress
What if I, I never grow out of it
Fear of never overcoming these struggles
What If I don’t grow
What if I remain stagnant?
What if I, What if I
Repeating the concern of stagnation
What If I can’t grow
What if growth is impossible?
What if I, What if I
Reiterating the fear of impossibility
What if I don’t grow
What if I'm incapable of progressing?
What if I, What if I
Continued worry about inability to progress
What If I can’t grow
Concern over the impossibility of growth
Grow out of it
Fear of not overcoming these challenges
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