Lyrics
I don't love myself
I lack self-love.
I don't love myself enough but I'm learning
I don't love myself sufficiently, but I'm in the process of learning.
Hard to make myself at home in a world where they all treating me like I'm vermin
It's challenging to feel comfortable in a world where others treat me poorly, like I'm vermin.
There was someone there the whole damn time that I've been searching
Despite searching, I've overlooked someone who was there for me all along.
Patching the holes in the walls of my heart really gotta give thanks to the surgeon
Expressing gratitude for the surgeon who metaphorically patched the holes in my heart.
Open the gates, somebody told me it wasn't too late
Receiving advice to open up and change, being told it's not too late.
Sorry I been dealing with some things, been too busy with my sins, but thank God you're so willing to wait
Apologizing for dealing with personal issues, but grateful for someone's willingness to wait.
I really don't want this feeling to fade, spirit inside me brought peace through the pain
Desiring to maintain a positive feeling, as inner peace was brought amid pain.
Make me a way through the valleys when I am too callous to see I'm beginning to break
Seeking guidance through difficult times when emotional resilience is diminishing.
Death to these dark times, things have never been all bright
Expressing a desire to overcome challenging periods, acknowledging life isn't always bright.
But with you by my side, we can start right here, it appears it'll be alright
Confident that with support, starting anew can lead to positive outcomes.
Let a fool try to start something online, just a pfp with a lil' spotlight
Not letting online negativity affect self-perception, aware of personal worth.
They gon talk but I know where my heart is, blood red stains on an off-white carpet
Remaining resilient against criticism, symbolized by bloodstains on an off-white carpet.
You're King, that's true
Acknowledging a higher power as King.
Sorry for the times that I screamed at you
Apologizing for moments of anger or frustration directed towards the higher power.
Almost didn't quite believe that you'd
Expressing doubt about the higher power's enduring presence during difficult times.
Still be here when I bleed in a vacuum
Believing in the higher power's constancy, even in challenging situations.
Now I'm gon' lose myself in your love I swear
Committing to losing oneself in the love of the higher power.
And improve my health while the world don't care
Focusing on self-improvement despite societal indifference.
You gave me some friends who will always be there
Grateful for supportive friends provided by the higher power.
And so I declare
Making a declaration, possibly of faith or commitment.
I don't love myself
Repeating the assertion of lacking self-love.
I don't love myself enough but I'm learning
Reiterating the acknowledgment of insufficient self-love and ongoing learning.
Hard to make myself at home in a world where they all treating me like I'm vermin
Echoing the difficulty of finding comfort in a judgmental world.
There was someone there the whole damn time that I've been searching
Reaffirming the realization of someone's constant presence despite prior search efforts.
Patching the holes in the walls of my heart really gotta give thanks to the surgeon
Expressing continued gratitude for emotional healing facilitated by the metaphorical surgeon.
You've made it clear to me that you're here with me through depression and regret
Acknowledging unwavering support through times of depression and regret.
You count each tear from me, you draw near to me when I'm begging to reset
Highlighting the higher power's attentiveness to emotional pain, especially during times of seeking a fresh start.
I don't make time for a nuisance, I couldn't care less for their two cents
Rejecting negativity and disinterest in others' opinions.
My mirror can raise its voice, but you're all that I need
Emphasizing the higher power as the essential source of support and self-affirmation.
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