When I Say No
Respecting Boundaries: When I Say No by Debbie Gibson
Lyrics
VERSE1:
Opening of the song structure
Maybe I thought I wanted to be here
Uncertainty about wanting to be present
Maybe I thought I wanted your lovin' tonight
Initial desire for affection
The music too slow, the lights too low
Discomfort with the setting
But something just wasn't right
Feeling that something is wrong
I started to fear your glowing eyes, your tender touch
Fear of the other person's actions
Your words they were too much for me
Feeling overwhelmed by the other person's words
But when I tried to push you away
Attempt to resist the situation
You said you didn't think I'd want it that way
Other person's disbelief in the resistance
CHORUS:
Transition to chorus
When I say no, that's what I mean
Emphasizing the importance of 'no'
Not maybe so or what's in between
Clarity in refusal, no ambiguity
If I said yes, that's what it would be
If consent is given, it's explicit
Is that what you heard? No!
Confirmation of misunderstood intentions
So step away from me
Request for physical distance
VERSE2:
Beginning of the second verse
True there are some girls who know what they're doing
Acknowledgment of some individuals' awareness
People think they get what they deserve
Belief in getting what one deserves
But look who's calling the kettle black
Irony in criticizing someone else
Baby you've got some nerve
Addressing the audacity of the other person
I do not know why the reasons lie so unclear
Confusion about unclear reasons
But boy you've got to understand
Encouraging understanding from the other person
If any girl rejects you
Rejection doesn't reflect on the rejector
Don't you doubt it's part of the plan
Emphasis on rejection being a part of life
CHORUS
Return to chorus
BRIDGE:
Transition to the bridge
Ego trips won't save you when your woman is deceived
Warning against reliance on ego
Act upon what matters baby, not how you're perceived
Focus on substantial actions, not perception
She will love you more and maybe the rest will follow
Suggestion to prioritize genuine love
But not if you push it baby!
Caution against being forceful
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