Lyrics
I don't wanna be your lover
I don't want to be in a romantic relationship with you.
If I can't even be your friend
Being friends is essential before considering a romantic connection.
All we do is lay in covers
Our interactions mainly involve being in bed together.
But no one ever makes the bed
Neglect and indifference are present in our relationship, as no one takes the effort to tidy up.
And I know that there's monsters under
There are underlying issues or fears represented by "monsters" beneath the surface.
But I'm afraid of you instead
Despite the monsters, the fear comes more from the partner than the unknown.
What's worse? What's real or in my head?
The uncertainty arises about what is worse or if the problems are real or imagined.
Sick of this, you're the only one who gets a kick of this
Frustration with the partner who finds pleasure in the current state of the relationship.
How can you claim, innocence
Questioning the partner's claim of innocence in the situation.
Your hands in my pockets
The partner taking advantage of the speaker's vulnerability, possibly metaphorically represented by "hands in my pockets."
But it's been a minute since
It has been a while since the speaker felt like their true self.
I've felt like myself I'm waking up again all by myself i'm shaking all the
Expressing a sense of isolation and vulnerability, struggling to face challenges alone.
Problems away from me, I had to build up a space that was safe for me
The need to create a safe space away from problems and negativity.
Where I can sit with my thoughts til it's safe to leave
Seeking solace in a space where the speaker can contemplate their thoughts before rejoining the external world.
I mean how much did I ask for?
Reflecting on the sacrifices made and questioning if they were worth it.
But you were never safe for me, I had to climb to a high that was safe to breathe
Having to rise to a higher state to find safety, both physically and emotionally.
And even though there was times that were great for me, this is never what I'm after
Despite positive moments, the current situation is not fulfilling the speaker's desires.
Cause
I don't wanna be your lover
Reiteration of not wanting a romantic relationship without a foundation of friendship.
If I can't even be your friend
Emphasizing the importance of friendship over a romantic connection.
All we do is lay in covers
Similar to the earlier lines, highlighting the limited nature of the relationship, mainly in bed.
But no one ever makes the bed
Reiterating the neglect in the relationship, symbolized by an unmade bed.
And I know that there's monsters under
Continuing the metaphor of "monsters" beneath the surface, suggesting ongoing fears or issues.
But I'm afraid of you instead
The fear primarily stems from the partner rather than the external "monsters."
What's worse? What's real or in my head?
Repeating the uncertainty about what is worse or if the problems are real or imagined.
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