Diary Of A Deadman
Unanswered Questions and Lingering Resentment
Lyrics
Looking back I still have so many questions
Reflecting on the past, the speaker has numerous unresolved questions.
So many things unanswered
Many aspects of the speaker's life remain unclear or without answers.
Like what did I do?
The speaker questions their actions in certain situations.
What could I do?
Contemplating potential alternative actions and their consequences.
Was there ever a moment you cared?
Expressing doubt about whether there was ever a moment of genuine care from someone.
Or was I always ugly and abandoned
Feeling unattractive and abandoned in past experiences.
Remember all the times you wished me harm
Recalling instances where someone desired harm or ill will towards the speaker.
You wished me dead
Highlighting intense negative feelings, including a wish for the speaker's death.
How could I have changed to make it better?
Reflecting on personal growth and the possibility of improving relationships.
And would I?
Contemplating the willingness to change for the better.
Would I?
Repeating the question, emphasizing uncertainty and introspection.
Why?
Expressing a desire for understanding the reasons behind certain actions.
I still feel so much hate inside of me
Acknowledging a lingering feeling of intense resentment within the speaker.
Seems like you were just waiting for me to fail
Suggesting that others anticipated and wanted the speaker to fail.
I'm sorry I can't forgive you
Expressing difficulty in forgiving those who have caused harm.
Do you blame me?
Prompting a question about whether the blame is reciprocated.
You never forgave me
Highlighting a lack of forgiveness from the other party.
I've tried to grow from this
Indicating efforts made by the speaker to learn and improve from past experiences.
Every day's a new challenge
Every new day presents a fresh set of challenges for personal growth.
Because with you, there is just no winning
Expressing a sense of futility in dealing with a person where there is no chance of winning.
Like it or not, I'm still a part of you
Acknowledging an inescapable connection with the person despite negative experiences.
And you're still a part of me
Stating the mutual influence and lasting connection between the speaker and the other person.
Like it or not
Reiterating the inescapable connection despite any resistance.
You're still a part of me
Emphasizing the enduring link between the speaker and the other person.
Yeah!
Adding a defiant affirmation of the enduring connection.
So this is how it ends
Describing a sense of conclusion or finality in the relationship.
All the tears, all the blood
Recalling past hardships, including tears and bloodshed.
It's all been for nothing
Expressing a feeling of futility, as if all efforts have been in vain.
As the candle dwindles, then flickers out
Using a metaphor of a dwindling candle to symbolize the fading of hope or life.
In the end
Conveying a sense of finality or conclusion, perhaps the end of the relationship.
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