Divorce Me C.O.D.
Navigating Heartbreak: Glen Campbell's 'Divorce Me C.O.D.' Message
Lyrics
I just bought me a great long ticket
I just purchased a long-distance ticket
I'm gonna use it at 4 P.M.
I plan to use it at 4 P.M.
So you can call your secret love
So you can inform your secret lover
And break the news to him
And let him know about our separation
You thought your little romance
You believed your affair was discreet
Was on the strict Q.T.
So if you desire your freedom immediately
So if you want your freedom P.D.q.
Divorce me promptly by mail
Divorce me C.O.d.
Divorce me through a certificate of deposit
I won't be around
I won't be present
To hear you cry
To witness your sorrow
I'm Texas bound
I'm heading to Texas
And by and by
Eventually
You can reach me down in Dallas
You can contact me in Dallas
A general delivery
Through general mail delivery
So if you want your freedom P.D.q.
If you seek an expedited separation
Divorce me C.O.d.
Divorce me quickly by mail
There's gonna come a day, girl
A time will come when you'll feel sad
When you'll be feelin' blue
When you'll struggle to settle debts
You'll can't pay your little old bill
You won't manage bills with IOUs
With a big old I.O.u.
Insignificant written promises
This dynamite you're playin' with
This dangerous game you're playing
May be T.N.t.
Might be explosive
So if you want your freedom P.D.q.
If you want a quick separation
Divorce me C.O.d.
Divorce me promptly by mail
No need to fall
No need to plead desperately
Down on your knees
There's no need to beg
'Cause I all I know
All I possess is basic knowledge
Are my ABC
Only familiar with the alphabet
I ain't no college professor
I'm not an academic
I ain't got no P.H.d.
I lack a doctorate degree
So if you want your freedom P.D.q
If you desire a swift separation
Divorce me C.O.d
Divorce me promptly by mail
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