Lyrics
Soon I'll reach a point in time
Anticipating a future moment
Where you're the last thing on my mind
Your constant presence in thoughts
And when I try to go to bed
Difficulty sleeping due to regret
My mind won't fill with things I should've said
Regrets about unspoken words
We've been avoiding this
Avoidance of a discussion or truth
Do you want to be honest yet
Questioning honesty in the relationship
I swear one day there'll be a time
Envisioning a future without thoughts of you
Where you're the last thing on my mind
Your diminishing significance
I won't be your paperman
Rejecting a role as a mere supporter
I can't stand to lose again
Fear of experiencing loss once more
Tried so hard to fill that void
Efforts to fill an emotional emptiness
Now I won't be your voice
Refusing to represent you anymore
No, no, no more, no more
Firm denial of continuing in that role
In you I thought I could confide
Belief in trust and sharing thoughts
And tell you what was on my mind
Inability to maintain open communication
Between us those things never stayed
Things never retained between you both
I can't deny no more I felt betrayed
Admitting a sense of betrayal
You say I'm missing out
Accusations of missing opportunities
You ready to be honest now
Challenge to embrace honesty now
No more will I feel so ashamed when I was trying
No longer feeling ashamed while trying
I won't be your paperman
Refusal to play a subservient role
I can't stand to lose again
Fear of experiencing loss again
Tried so hard to fill that void
Past efforts to fill emotional emptiness
Now I won't be your voice
Rejecting the role of being a spokesperson
And I know it hurts to see me thrive
Acknowledgment of pain caused by progress
But I can't wait while you decide
Unwillingness to wait for indecision
You never could apologize
Historical lack of apology causing distress
That used to keep me up at night
Past issues causing sleepless nights
Will I ever understand
Questioning the possibility of understanding
Why some things just don't go as planned
Reflection on plans gone awry
You tried to push my words aside
Attempt to disregard expressed feelings
I hope it hurts to see me thrive, yeah
Desire for the other to witness personal growth
I'll take no more of that
Firm refusal to endure more mistreatment
I'll take no more of that
Repeated refusal to tolerate mistreatment
I'll take no more of that
Continued refusal to accept mistreatment
Was it natural to forgive yourself
Questioning the naturalness of self-forgiveness
Wish it was natural to forgive myself
Wishing for the naturalness of self-forgiveness
Should it be natural to forgive ourselves
Debating the nature of self-forgiveness
I don't know, no
Uncertainty about the possibility of self-forgiveness
Comment