Lyrics
I feel cheated, so I cheat myself
I feel deceived or wronged, so I deceive myself in response.
I feel defeated, so I defeat myself
I feel overwhelmed by failure, so I deliberately bring about my own defeat.
Drown your sorrows again and again
Repeating a cycle of drowning one's sorrows as a coping mechanism.
Push away and deny this misery
Rejecting and avoiding the acknowledgment of pain and suffering.
These feelings and instincts remain
Persistent emotions and instincts are still present despite efforts to suppress them.
I'm struggling to pull myself from my grave
Struggling to overcome a metaphorical grave or difficult situation.
Let me be the one with the infinite
Desire to be the one with infinite strength or power.
Let me be the one
Expressing a wish to be the chosen one.
Let me be the one with the infinite
Reiteration of the desire to possess infinite strength.
I won't be chained to the earth
Refusing to be bound or limited by earthly constraints.
I just need the will
Expressing a need for the strength of will to resist undesirable impulses.
To suppress the urge
Desiring the ability to control and suppress destructive urges.
I can't suppress the urge
An admission of struggling to control and suppress those urges.
I've built so many barriers
Having created numerous emotional or psychological barriers.
I'm healing to suffer again
Engaging in a process of healing only to experience suffering once again.
Time has given me no remorse
Time has not brought any relief or regret for past actions.
Spiritually bankrupt
Feeling spiritually empty or devoid of meaning.
Just give me the grace to oppose this sin
Pleading for the strength to resist committing sins.
Haunted by the things I've done
Tormented by the consequences of past actions.
Is this guilt and shame the price I pay
Questioning whether guilt and shame are the consequences paid for mistakes.
I hate myself for this weakness
Expressing self-hatred for perceived weaknesses.
I won't be chained to the earth
Reiteration of the refusal to be constrained by earthly limitations.
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