Lyrics
Fuck
Expressing frustration or anger
I don't wanna think
Desire to avoid thinking about something
I don't wanna leave my bed
Reluctance to get out of bed, possibly feeling overwhelmed
I just wanna play dead
Wishing to avoid responsibilities or life
Stuck in a rut again, it's my fault, it always is
Feeling stuck in a repetitive cycle and taking responsibility for it
Don't wash my hair
Disregard for personal grooming
Don't know who to blame, maybe it's just me
Uncertainty about who or what is to blame for certain situations
I'm making progress and then backslide takes me back to fucking
Progress followed by setbacks leading to frustration
Been here before, been here my whole life
Sense of familiarity with difficult situations
Maybe it's just me
Self-reflection on personal responsibility
Pick it up, pick it up, straighten up your back young man
Encouragement to improve posture or demeanor
Let go of me
Desire to be free from something or someone
No turning back, now I know, fuck
Realization of irreversible actions or consequences
Memories all cursed
Unpleasant memories haunting the present
Memories of how you treated everyone you couldn't groom
Recollection of mistreatment of others
And I want it back
Desire to reclaim something lost or wasted time
Every minute I spent worried about looking bad in the eyes of that freak
Concern about others' perceptions and judgments
Fuck you and the power trips - household politics
Rejection of power struggles and manipulation
Couldn't take the fucking torture
Intense aversion to suffering or pain
I want it back
Wish to retrieve something lost or gone forever
Can't get it back
Feeling unable to recover what's lost
Stop looking back
Struggling to move forward due to inability to accept an ending
I can't move on if I can't accept the finality
Difficulty in progressing without closure or acceptance
But it doesn't work
Frustration with unsuccessful coping mechanisms
Why do I still hurt
Questioning the persistence of emotional pain
Did I deserve to burn
Feelings of guilt or deserving punishment
I was raised by a fucking predator
Being influenced or affected negatively by a manipulative figure
Why did God decide we fucking need this pain
Questioning the necessity of experiencing pain or suffering
I was spared the worst of it but I'm still feeling broken. Defeated
Feeling damaged despite not experiencing the worst
But I can't dwell. I can't help
Desire to move forward despite feeling unable to help
Fuck it
Resignation or dismissal of the situation
Cant ignore the swirling vortex swallowing my mind
Feeling overwhelmed by intrusive thoughts or emotions
If I try screaming fuck it fuck you it won't make it stop or make it fake
Realization that expressing frustration won't alleviate the pain
I'm reeling and not healing and I'm not sure I can take it
Struggling with emotional turmoil and uncertainty about recovery
But I'll try oh God I'll try oh God I'll try oh God I'll try
Determination to attempt to cope or overcome the situation
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