Heartbreak School
Love's Curriculum: Lessons from Heartbreak School
Lyrics
Let me tell you 'bout my alma mater
Introducing the alma mater, the place where the singer learned about heartbreak.
Got educated by a rich man's daughter
Describes being romantically involved with a wealthy woman.
I didn't have to read a single book
Expressing that the singer's education did not involve traditional academic learning.
One lesson is all it took
Implies that a single painful experience was enough to teach a significant lesson.
My diploma reads First Class Fool
The singer's diploma humorously labels them a "First Class Fool" for their heartbreak.
I graduated from Heartbreak School
Graduating from "Heartbreak School" signifies completion of a painful romantic experience.
They don't teach science they don't teach math
Describes the unconventional subjects taught in Heartbreak School, such as love history.
Our love is history is your only class
Highlights that the only class is focused on the history of the singer's love life.
You do your homework every lonely night
Metaphorically portrays dealing with heartbreak as doing homework every night.
Study memories till the morning light
Suggests the singer spends sleepless nights recalling memories of the past relationship.
Forget about her is the golden rule
States the golden rule of Heartbreak School: forget about the person causing heartache.
That's what they teach you in heartbreak school
Reiterates the teachings of Heartbreak School regarding moving on from a broken relationship.
You don't get recess you don't get lunch
Describes the lack of breaks or relief from the emotional pain of heartbreak.
You don't get vacation when summer time comes
Emphasizes the continuous nature of heartbreak, even during traditionally enjoyable times.
You don't get in cause they think your smart
Humorously suggests that intelligence is a barrier to entering Heartbreak School.
You pay tuition with a broken heart
Links the payment of "tuition" to experiencing a broken heart in romantic relationships.
I learned to cry and I learned to moan
Lists emotional experiences learned at Heartbreak School, including crying and feeling lonely.
I learned I hate to spend my nights alone
Expresses a dislike for solitude, learned through the heartbreak experience.
I studied hard on how do I forget you (then I)
Describes the singer's efforts to forget the person who caused heartbreak.
Wrote a speech on wish I'd never met you
Humorously mentions creating a speech on regretting meeting the person who caused heartbreak.
I got accepted to who needs you
Announces the singer's acceptance into the imaginary "Who Needs You" institution.
I was the Valedictorian at Heartbreak school
Humorously declares the singer as the top student (Valedictorian) at Heartbreak School.
You don't get recess you don't get lunch
Repeats the idea of the continuous nature of heartbreak, without breaks or relief.
You don't get vacation when summer time comes
Reiterates the concept of heartbreak persisting even during summer vacation.
You don't get in cause they think your smart
Repeats the humorous notion that intelligence is a hindrance to entering Heartbreak School.
You pay tuition with a broken heart
Reiterates the payment for heartbreak education is a broken heart.
So come enroll if you've been mistreated
Invites others who have experienced mistreatment to enroll in Heartbreak School.
Get extra credit if your baby cheated
Suggests additional credit is given to those who have experienced infidelity in relationships.
All you need are tears and misery
States the only requirements for enrollment are tears and misery.
To start working toward your Ph.D
Humorously frames the process of healing from heartbreak as working towards a Ph.D. in misery.
Everybody past the age of two
Claims that everyone past the age of two has experienced heartbreak education.
Gets educated at Heartbreak School
Reiterates that Heartbreak School is a universal experience for those who have faced romantic challenges.
You'll never find yourself a love that's true
Suggests finding true love is unlikely until one has completed the education at Heartbreak School.
'Til you've graduated from Heartbreak School
Reiterates the idea that genuine love is only found after graduating from Heartbreak School.
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