Lyrics
I don’t even question it no more
I no longer question the situation.
I tried to hold it in they told me to a less is saying more
I tried to keep my emotions in check as advised, understanding that sometimes saying less is more impactful.
You showed me how to love you showed me not to be a whore
You taught me how to love and not engage in promiscuous behavior.
You told me hold it down and then you opened up the door
You instructed me to stay committed, and then you opened new opportunities for me.
I know you had way more to give I hate you had to go
I regret that you had to leave, knowing you had more to offer.
You held me by hand and showed me ways to never fall
You guided me through challenges, showing me ways to avoid pitfalls.
You know that I don’t bend or crack and let alone just fold
I'm resilient and don't easily break or yield, especially under pressure.
I see it in those pictures stand behind me while I crawl the biggest smile
I see happiness in those pictures, with you supporting me during tough times and challenges.
They say that time heals everything but this don’t heal at all
Despite the belief that time heals, the pain from your absence persists.
I’m tired of giving love to those who don’t give that same love back
I'm exhausted from giving love to those who don't reciprocate.
I remember times I’ve seen you laugh and gosh I loved that
I cherish the moments I've seen you laugh.
I remember all those hugs and mom I swear I want that
I remember the warmth of your hugs, longing for that maternal connection.
Held my hand in pain and saw my tears and then you wiped that
You comforted me in pain, witnessing my tears and wiping them away.
I hold on to everything when peewee ask where mom at
I cling to everything, especially when asked about your whereabouts.
I would give it all even my life to get my moms back
I would sacrifice everything, even my life, to have you back.
I don’t think you get it nigga
Expressing frustration that understanding is lacking.
Many things I’ve said and did to moms that I’m regretting nigga
Regretting past words and actions towards mom.
I still look at pictures with you smiling in them
Still cherishing pictures of you with a smile.
I still see the videos and hear your laugh and cry
The memories of videos, laughter, and tears linger.
I know they say that karmas ugly this is probably why
Reflecting on the idea that karma might be the reason for the pain.
I hate those time when you would call and I would press decline
Regretting the times when calls from you were ignored.
And now I’m wishing you would hit that call just one more time
Wishing for just one more call from you.
I know you seen my moves you probably hate that shit
Acknowledging that you may disapprove of certain life choices.
But this my way to cope and I repent that shit
Using coping mechanisms, acknowledging and repenting for past mistakes.
I know you see him grow that nigga 8 years old
Acknowledging the growth of an 8-year-old, missing moments with you.
That little nigga getting big so many things that I can’t hold no more
Feeling overwhelmed by the inability to hold on to many emotions.
I still glance at memories I keep up in my mental
Reflecting on memories stored in the mind.
I know I broke promises but trust I never meant to
Admitting to breaking promises but emphasizing no ill intentions.
This the only time you looking down on me
This is the only time you are watching over, and I hope you find peace.
I know you happy out of pain that shit is fine by me
Acknowledging that your happiness, even if out of pain, is acceptable.
I know you see my truth and maybe scared a bit
Believing that you perceive the truth, possibly with some apprehension.
I be doing shit just for the hell of it
Engaging in certain actions as a way of coping, possibly without clear intent.
I be doing things with you in mind and I can’t front I might be scared a bit
Performing actions with you in mind, admitting to some fear.
But trust me when I say this ain’t for me this is for you
Assuring that current actions are not self-serving but done for you.
And trust me when I tell you
Emphasizing the truth in the statement that you are not truly gone but at rest.
You ain’t gone you just at rest cause if I had to choose my moms I’d choose you 100 times cause you the best
If given the choice, the speaker would choose their mom a hundred times because she's the best.
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