Bastard Son
Struggles of Abandonment: A Journey Through Pain and Resilience
Lyrics
Well I know it's no secret
The speaker acknowledges that being a drunk is not a secret.
I'm a drunk just like you
Expressing similarity between the speaker and the listener, both being drunks.
As I sit here counting the change in my pocket
The speaker is counting change to buy alcohol, attempting to cope with emotions.
To get a drunk and try to forget you
Drinking to numb the pain and forget someone (possibly a lost love).
So many days I questioned and I wondered
Reflecting on past days with confusion and questioning mistakes.
Wondering what did I do wrong
Wondering about personal culpability for the situation.
Cause mama said it was all cause of me
Attributing the departure to a parental figure's statement.
You left that Friday night and never returned
Describing the abandonment that occurred on a Friday night.
And every day
Expressing a routine of praying and longing for a return.
I prayed and I wished and I wondered
Continuation of the emotional struggle and anticipation.
When you would come back
Hopeful speculation about the eventual return of the absent person.
When you would return
Repeating the desire for a reunion.
But I found comfort and courage
Finding solace and bravery in alcohol consumption.
Inside of a bottle
Choosing not to care about the return of the absent person.
Now I don't care if you return
Indifference to the return, indicating a coping mechanism found in alcohol.
I grew up alone with no direction
Describing a lonely upbringing without clear guidance.
I learned about life the hard way
Learning life lessons through difficult experiences and mistakes.
Made mistakes and learned about rejection
Reflecting on experiencing rejection during youth.
I was a kid out on the streets running astray
Being a wayward child running on the streets.
I began to look for my place in life
Searching for identity and purpose in life.
Cause I knew I didn't fit with every one
Feeling different and not fitting in with others.
I was the kid with no father and no Monday
Highlighting the absence of a father figure and routine on Mondays.
But I found a home in my guitar and my songs
Discovering a sense of belonging through music and creativity.
Now I don't care if you return
Reiteration of indifference to the return of the absent person.
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