Lyrics
I say I wanna wake up with the dawn
The desire to start the day early with sunrise.
But every night I sleep with the shades drawn
Despite the desire to wake up early, the speaker prefers sleeping with the shades drawn, suggesting a preference for darkness or avoidance of reality.
I keep telling my shrink, "I wanna feel okay"
Expressing the wish to feel emotionally stable and discussing it with a therapist.
But I get off on all my bummer days
Admitting to finding pleasure or satisfaction in melancholic or down moments (bummer days).
I don't know what I want but I know that I feel bad
Uncertainty about personal desires coupled with a consistent feeling of sadness.
And then when I feel good, I think I make myself sad
Suggesting a self-sabotaging tendency—feeling good triggers a sense of sadness.
I wanna feel like I can get out of my own way
Expressing the desire to overcome self-limiting behaviors.
I'll stop crying at my party
Committing to stopping tears at social events.
I'm tired of feeling sorry
Frustration with self-pity and a determination to stop feeling sorry for oneself.
I've had about fifty last cigarettes
Describing a history of smoking and its connection to fleeting moments.
Before they're out, I have the next one lit
Continuing the cycle of smoking, using it as a coping mechanism.
I spent the last two years in shoes that were too big
Metaphorically walking in shoes too big—struggling with challenges that may be overwhelming.
And if it's not my lungs I'm gonna die
Fear of mortality, with a particular concern about the impact of the speaker's actions on their lungs.
Because I trip
Metaphorically tripping—facing obstacles or making mistakes.
I don't know what I want but I know that I feel bad
Reiteration of feeling bad without clarity on personal desires.
And then when I feel good, I think I make myself sad
Linking feeling good with a subsequent sense of sadness, possibly due to self-sabotage.
I wanna feel like I can get out of my own way
Desire to break free from self-imposed limitations.
I'll stop crying at my party
Committing to end crying during social events.
I'm tired of feeling sorry
Frustration with self-pity and a determination to stop feeling sorry for oneself.
There's always something that I'm doing
Recognition of self-sabotaging behaviors that hinder progress.
To keep me far from where I say I'm going
Acknowledging actions that deviate from the intended path.
I'll stop crying at my party
Reiterating the commitment to end tears during social events.
I'm tired of feeling sorry
Frustration with self-pity and a determination to stop feeling sorry for oneself.
I'll stop crying at my party
Continuing the commitment to end tears during social events.
Because I'm tired
Expressing fatigue, possibly both physically and emotionally.
I don't know what I want but I know that I feel bad
Reiteration of feeling bad without clarity on personal desires.
And then when I feel good, I think I make myself sad
Linking feeling good with a subsequent sense of sadness, possibly due to self-sabotage.
I wanna feel like I can get out of my own way
Desire to break free from self-imposed limitations.
Oh, what would it feel like if I could get out of my own way
Pondering the positive experience of breaking free from limitations.
I'll stop crying at my party
Committing to end crying during social events.
I'm tired of feeling sorry
Frustration with self-pity and a determination to stop feeling sorry for oneself.
I'll stop crying at my party
Continuing the commitment to end tears during social events.
I'm tired of feeling sorry
Frustration with self-pity and a determination to stop feeling sorry for oneself.
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