Lyrics
It was 22 degrees
It was a specific temperature, 22 degrees.
I put my shit in boxes
The speaker packed their belongings.
I told my folks I'm coming home
The speaker informed their family they're returning home.
To a town that has left me so broken down and bent
Returning to a town that emotionally drained and damaged them.
With so many broken hearted photographs in my mind that I can't shed
Memories of heartbreak and pain linger vividly in the speaker's mind.
And every late night out on Oakwood's been swept away by the train tracks
Memories of enjoyable late nights have been overshadowed by negative associations linked to train tracks.
That I never thought my love could disown
The speaker never anticipated their love or affection to become estranged.
It was 22 degrees
Reiteration of the temperature, 22 degrees.
I told my folks I'm coming home
Repeating the intention to return home to family.
And I just want home to feel like home again
The desire for home to regain its comforting and familiar essence.
A distant state of mind that I can't hold
Feeling distanced from a state of mind associated with 'home.'
And I can't hold the weight of the summer in this Christmas cold
Struggling to reconcile the warmth of summer with the coldness of the current environment.
Where it doesn't even matter anymore
Feeling indifferent to matters that once held significance.
When I passed that street, I knew this was more than I bargained for
Realization that the situation surpasses initial expectations.
When I awoke in my bed, I knew this was more than I bargained for
Awareness dawns about the unexpected nature of the circumstances.
When I picked up my friends, we drove to the city
Driving to the city as a means of escape from unpleasant aspects left behind.
An excuse just to get away from the shitty things
Escaping from negative experiences or situations.
That I left behind in this village I loved
A place once loved now holds emotional baggage.
Where I stored all my cries, because I've dealt with them enough
Suppressed emotions stored in this familiar place.
And then I moved to college to start a new chapter
Starting a new phase in college, postponing dealing with problems.
"I'll deal with my woes at the end of the semester"
Delaying resolution of issues until the semester ends.
I made it this far, I'm back where I started
Realizing a cycle of returning to a similar emotional state.
In a cloud way too dark, in a rainstorm of incongruity
Feeling overwhelmed by a cloud of negativity and inconsistency.
And I knew this was more than I bargained for
Acknowledging the unexpected and overwhelming nature of the situation.
And every single step that I take collapses on itself and my own personal hell
Every action seems to lead to personal turmoil and distress.
Is a collection of outdated reasons to wake up way too tired
Existing reasons to continue are outdated and exhausting.
And this bed is full of spiders as I lie to myself
Metaphorical discomfort within oneself and surroundings.
And say I'm passed all of this bullshit, when It's too bottled up to tell
Struggling with internal conflicts while attempting self-assurance.
And this place brings out the worst in me, it exposes what I hide
Feeling exposed and vulnerable in this familiar place.
The remnants of a shattered boy who fucked up his own mind
Residues of a fractured self caused by self-inflicted damage.
But I know that if I promise not to repeat this mental pattern
Understanding the need to break negative thought patterns.
I can drive past that street and the past won't matter
Hoping to move past old memories by making a commitment.
But for now I'll just take a deep breath
A pause to regain composure amid ongoing struggles.
There's a lot of shit that I'm clearly not over yet
Acknowledging unresolved emotional baggage.
And I just want home to feel like home again
Longing for the feeling of familiarity and comfort associated with 'home.'
I just want home to feel like home again
Reiteration of the desire for 'home' to regain its former essence.
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