Airports and Airports
Yearning for Connection: Emotional Journey Through Loss and Longing
Lyrics
I’m not mad, I’ve just been hurting a lot
I have not been angry; I have been experiencing a lot of pain.
And I’ve been thinking about how we used to talk
I've been reflecting on our past conversations.
Like we knew each other, like you knew me a lot
We used to talk as if we were close, like you understood me well.
I thought you could see the pain in my eyes
I believed you could perceive the pain in my eyes.
When we buried my dad’s dad and I wore that disguise
During the funeral of my grandfather, I concealed my emotions behind a facade.
Of acting like I’m stronger than I am, even though I’m not
I pretended to be stronger than I actually am.
You assumed I was fine
You assumed I was okay without considering the time needed to heal.
You didn’t think it would take time
You didn't anticipate the healing process would take time.
Jessica, do you hear me calling for you at night
I call out for Jessica at night while avoiding streetlights.
When I’m walking in the middle of the streets avoiding the street lights?
I feel lost and disconnected during these nighttime walks.
Jessica, I promise this is the last song with your name
This is supposedly the last song mentioning Jessica, even if it's not entirely true.
I know that’s not true but I have to say it all the same
Despite knowing it may not be the last, I feel compelled to say it.
Could you feel me holding my breath
I wonder if you could sense my breath-holding while listening to your voicemail.
When I listened to the voicemail that you sent
The voicemail conveyed your confusion and then you disappeared.
You said you were mixed up and then off you went
I've been losing sleep excessively and contemplating leaving for a while.
Well, I’ve been losing sleep like it’s out of style
Considering traveling to explore what the world has to offer.
Been thinking about going away for a while
Just to see the world and what it wants to offer me
Expressing a desire to experience what the world can provide.
I just miss things, don’t you?
Expressing a longing for things from the past.
I was so foolish for loving you
Regretting being foolish for loving someone.
“Hey um it’s me. I kinda assume you’re at work or something, I know it’s kinda late, but I’m sorry my Monday’s are really packed I would have called you earlier otherwise. Um. Call me back? If you want or text me. I don’t know. I’m just very lost and confused right now, I guess. Um, yeah. Um mhm. So, I don’t know, I’ve got a bunch of stuff I’m working on tonight so I don’t know if I’ll be able to answer if you call back so, yeah. I hope you had a good day. I’ll talk to you maybe. Bye.”
The voicemail indicates confusion and a busy schedule, expressing a need for contact.
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