Lyrics
I know we said "what if"
I remember discussing hypothetical situations
And "it always ends the same" but
We acknowledged that things tend to conclude similarly
I'm so sick of thinking that I hurt you
I am tired of believing I caused you pain
And how I'm so ashamed
Feeling deep regret and embarrassment
of who I am, of who I was
I feel ashamed of my past and present self
or how I made you cry
Reflecting on moments where I made you cry
I swear I'm not ignoring you
Assuring that I'm not neglecting you intentionally
I just can't tell you why
Unable to articulate the reasons for my actions
I know you said "Come with me?
Recalling your plea for companionship
Please don't leave me"
Expressing the fear of abandonment
I want to make you feel
Desire to evoke emotions in you
The way that I do
Wishing to share my emotional state with you
You need to understand
Stressing the importance of understanding my experiences
What I've been through
Highlighting the challenges I've faced
I want to give you all of me
Expressing the desire to offer my complete self
But I can't right now
Currently unable to fulfill that desire
I'm so disappointed in myself
Feeling self-disappointment for becoming too involved
For getting too deep
Regret for delving too deeply into a situation
For getting upset
Regret for becoming upset
I don't like me, why do you?
Expressing dislike for oneself and questioning why you love me
And after all I put you through
Acknowledging the difficulties I've caused you
Why should you care about me ?
Questioning why you should care about me given my actions
I want to forget what I've done
Desire to erase the memories of my mistakes
I just need you to forgive me
Seeking your forgiveness for my actions
I need to be alone
Expressing the need for solitude
I'm scared you'll forget about me
Fearful of being forgotten by you
I want to make you feel
Desire to evoke emotions in you (repeated)
The way that I do
Wishing to share my emotional state with you (repeated)
You need to understand
Stressing the importance of understanding my experiences (repeated)
What I've been through
Highlighting the challenges I've faced (repeated)
I waited for you
Expressing the act of waiting for you
I waited too long
Regret for waiting too long
And every time I think about you
Reflecting on the consequences of my actions when thinking about you
I know I did you wrong
Acknowledging the wrongdoing and harm I caused
It's like I had the perfect
Imagining an idealized image in my mind
Picture painted in my head
Realizing that I went against my own declarations
But little did I know
Unaware that my actions would contradict my words
I’d go against everything I said
Regret for not staying true to my promises
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