I Never Wanted This
Unspoken Farewells: The Poignant Journey of Change
Lyrics
I'm not the same as I once was
I've undergone a change from my past self.
My eyes flutter between my faults
I reflect on my flaws, causing my vision to waver.
I'm not the same as I once was
Reiterating the transformation from my previous self.
My head won't sway as much this fall
My mental state is more stable this autumn.
I'm not the type to leave early
I usually don't leave early, seeking permission this time.
But I'm asking before I go
Asking if this encounter will be our last before departure.
Will this be the last time I see you
Questioning if this meeting marks our final farewell.
But you can't answer cause we don't know
Realizing uncertainty, as the answer remains unknown.
Don't call me once I'm home
Requesting not to be contacted once I'm home.
Our bodies will never know each other
Our physical closeness will never happen.
But I need you in some way
Despite the physical gap, I need your presence emotionally.
Just don't leave me alone
Fearing loneliness, urging not to be left alone.
I shouldn't think about you when I think of who I once was
Avoiding thoughts of you while reminiscing about my past self.
And you know my name but you won't say it
You recognize my name but choose not to utter it.
You might declare it, but you won't break it off
Possibly acknowledging the relationship but unwilling to end it.
I knew you cared when we were still around some days
Expressing care in the past, memories of better days.
Did you see me in the back seat when you
Referencing a moment in the back seat, questioning if noticed.
Didn't care, you would not let me go
You ignored my presence but held onto me, refusing to let go.
But I am not around anymore
I am no longer physically present in your life.
And I'm sorry for that
Expressing regret for the absence.
Life is full of these connections
Life is filled with such relationships.
I can't live life without expecting this to go
Expecting such connections to change and evolve.
My apprehension isn't spot on when I'm with you
Uncertainty arises when with you, not aligning with my expectations.
No eye contact, make intentions known
Avoiding eye contact, but intentions are clear.
I'll see you when I see you
Meeting again is uncertain; I'll see you when it happens.
I never wanted this to go like this
Expressing disappointment in the unexpected turn of events.
I never wanted this, I never wanted this
Repeating the desire for a different outcome.
And you know my name but you won't say it
You recognize my name but choose not to utter it.
You might declare it, but you won't break it off
Possibly acknowledging the relationship but unwilling to end it.
I knew you cared when we were still around some days
Expressing care in the past, memories of better days.
Did you see me in the back seat when you
Referencing a moment in the back seat, questioning if noticed.
Didn't care, you would not let me go
You ignored my presence but held onto me, refusing to let go.
But I am not around anymore
I am no longer physically present in your life.
And I'm sorry for that
Expressing regret for the absence.
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