Lyrics
I'm not awake tryna hurt myself
I am not fully conscious, trying to avoid self-harm.
We in this trip just tryna find ourselves
We are on a journey, seeking to discover our true selves.
Till you get caught up and you lose yourself
Until you get entangled and lose your identity.
Ain't that deep that's what I tell myself
It's not profound; that's what I convince myself.
I numb all the pain I put it on my shelve
I numb emotional pain, storing it away.
Nothing gonna hurt me till I hurt myself
Nothing will harm me unless I harm myself.
I won't get open though I need some help
I won't open up, though I need assistance.
I do it alone till I break my shell
I handle things alone until I break my shell.
And It's not that bad till you hear the news
It doesn't seem bad until you hear the news.
Doesn't look hard till you fit in my shoes
Challenges don't appear difficult until you walk in my shoes.
Don't feel the pain till I get a bruise
I don't feel pain until I have a visible injury.
You can't really say till you pay your dues
You can't truly understand until you've paid your dues.
Cos when I feel crazy I can't sleep
When I feel mentally unstable, sleep eludes me.
This weight feels way too heavy on me
The burden feels too heavy on me.
Feels so wavy in the deep
The situation feels intense and profound.
And I won't die before I fall asleep
I won't die until I fall asleep.
Till I die
Expressing determination to endure until death.
You know that I'm a hard guy
Affirming resilience and toughness.
I don't budge I
I don't yield easily.
Just react to these situations as they fall I
Reacting to situations as they occur.
Never show my tears you know I won't cry
Suppressing tears, avoiding displays of vulnerability.
Ohh I don show everything is gone alright
Implying that everything is alright, even if it's not.
Till I get the gwap I won't fine
I won't be fine until I acquire wealth.
I break these ties if you cross the line
Breaking ties if someone crosses a boundary.
I become hard till I get my dime
Adopting a tough stance until financial success.
Boiling internally 99
Experiencing internal turmoil at 99 degrees.
Ohh Lord
An exclamation seeking guidance or understanding.
I'm going crazy
Expressing a state of mental distress.
I don lost my mind
Indicating a loss of sanity or rationality.
We're all at war
Describing a collective state of conflict or struggle.
The homes are empty
Noting empty homes, deviating from the intended plan.
This not part of the design
Highlighting the unexpected nature of the current situation.
And It's not that bad till you hear the news
Reiterating that things don't seem bad until you hear the news.
Doesn't look hard till you fit in my shoes
Reemphasizing that challenges are not apparent until experienced.
Don't feel the pain till I get a bruise
Not feeling pain until physical harm is evident.
You can't really say till you pay your dues
Asserting that true understanding comes after paying dues.
Cos when I feel crazy I can't sleep
Experiencing sleeplessness during moments of mental instability.
This weight feels way too heavy on me
The emotional burden feels overwhelmingly heavy.
Feels so wavy in the deep
Feeling a profound and intense emotional state.
And I won't die before I fall asleep
Committing to endure until falling asleep.
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