Lyrics
In general I be at war with myself in a major way
In general, I am in a significant internal conflict.
I try to keep it private but I've already stained the page
I attempt to keep my struggles private, but I've already documented them.
When this ink fades to grey
As the ink representing my troubles fades, I hope to find peace.
I'm hopin' that I'm chillin' and I've finally paved my way
I wish to be relaxed and have successfully paved my way.
I lay awake thinkin' about how I can upgrade my trade
I spend sleepless nights contemplating how to improve my skills or profession.
I gotta get paid some day
I need to earn money eventually.
Man I don't give a fuck about superstardom
I don't care about achieving superstardom.
I just wanna make enough to not work at the supermarket
My goal is to make enough money to avoid working at a supermarket.
Not a place for someone who's an artist
A supermarket is not a suitable place for an artist like me.
Things I do regardless
I do certain things regardless to earn money for my dream and try to be strategic.
To make a dollar to invest into this dream, tryna move the smartest
I aim to invest my earnings wisely into my dream.
Imma shoot the target
I am determined to hit my goals.
I've been puttin' in the labour I'm still waitin' for the fruit to blossom
I've put in effort, but I'm still waiting for the results.
Just some food for thought it's
Reflecting on my efforts, it's like providing food for thought.
Instantaneous that after all that labour I just blaze a spliff
After hard work, it's quick and instantaneous to relax with a joint.
Kickin' back and rollin' up the pain and then exhalin' it
Relaxing and coping with pain by smoking and exhaling.
Take a hit and take a sip my mind is feelin' wavy shit
Taking substances to alter my mind state.
I'm sailin' it, out here on the water everyday ya dig
Metaphorically sailing through life's challenges.
Every hour I'm not workin' I'm gettin' fucked up
When not working, I indulge in substances.
Try to tell me it's not healthy shut the fuck up
Rejecting concerns about my health.
Not 'bout progression then our ties will soon be undone
If not about progress, our connections will weaken.
You'll be trippin' on your laces I'll just puff puff
While others stumble, I focus on enjoying life.
Alcoholic tendencies turnin' wine to water
My habits sometimes turn my troubles into something else.
Sometimes it's wholly spirits sometimes it's others
My struggles are sometimes caused by external influences.
Don't pray the lord to save me to recover I don't wanna
I don't want prayers for recovery; I prefer my vices.
Imma just keep drinkin' booze and smokin' marijuana
I'll continue drinking and smoking despite my financial struggles.
Already broke, can't afford to take a break or hit the brakes
Financially strained, I can't afford a break.
Switchin' lanes, tryna get myself out to a different place
Trying to change my situation by taking risks.
I lift a j, light it, smoke it now I got a missin' face
Indulging in substances, causing a loss of self.
I drift away, woke up and decided that I'll live today
Escaping reality temporarily but deciding to live for today.
Alcoholic tendencies turnin' wine to water
Similar struggles with substances turning troubles into something else.
Sometimes it's wholly spirits sometimes it's others
External influences sometimes complicate my life.
Don't pray the lord to save me to recover I don't wanna
Rejecting prayers for recovery, preferring vices.
Imma just keep drinkin' booze and smokin' marijuana
Continuing self-destructive habits despite awareness.
They say this shit's for recreation and it's not my medication
Questioning the recreational nature of habits when they are daily necessities.
Why I do it everyday then? Need it just like respiration
Despite being considered recreation, habits are essential for survival.
It's entertainin' that they haven't changed the legislation
Commenting on the lack of changes in societal attitudes.
They out here thinkin' that I'm gonna be a mental patient
People anticipate mental health issues due to his habits.
Shit, they probably right
Admitting the possibility of others being right about his mental state.
Dark rings around my eyes 'cause sleep can put up a fight
Physical signs of exhaustion from the struggle with sleep.
Pick up the spliff and light it then I kiss it goodnight
Bidding farewell to the day with a joint before sleep.
Barely slippin' into dreams of the good life
Struggling to attain the dream life in dreams.
Yeah
Accepting the reality of his choices.
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