Kurt Cocaine
Struggling Shadows: A Melodic Tale of Substance and Reflection
Lyrics
I’m tired of getting fucked up
I'm tired of engaging in self-destructive behavior.
2 Beers, 5 Shots
Consuming two beers and five shots of alcohol.
My stomach erupts
Experiencing nausea or discomfort in the stomach.
Faded fast with intentions to continue
Becoming intoxicated quickly with the intention to continue.
cut short by a toilet bowl and yearning for you
The desire to continue the intoxication is interrupted by vomiting and a longing for someone.
Sometimes it’s all that I can do to feel a fucking thing
Expressing difficulty in feeling emotions; a sense of numbness.
Sometimes it’s just a facade to fit in
Using a facade to conform and fit in with others.
Sometimes I wish that you could save me
Expressing a wish for someone to rescue or help.
Sometimes I wish it would all just go away
Expressing a desire for all the challenges to disappear.
I’m tired of smoking again
Expressing fatigue with smoking.
3 Dabs, 2 Joints
Consuming three dabs and two joints.
No hint of relief
No relief or improvement in the situation.
Paranoia when I’m with my friends
Feeling paranoid when with friends.
Alone the feeling is ecstasy
Experiencing ecstasy or intense pleasure when alone.
Sometimes I wonder what it would be like
Contemplating what life would be like without the current struggles.
Sometimes I wonder how it would be
Wondering about alternative scenarios and outcomes.
Just to forget it all
Expressing a desire to forget everything.
Sometimes I just let go completely
Occasionally letting go of control completely.
But I can’t help thinking
Despite letting go, still plagued by self-blame and reflection.
That all of this was my fault
Feeling responsible for the current state of affairs.
Cuz when I think of the worst man that I know
Reflecting on a negative image of oneself, represented as the worst person.
All I see is a room of mirrors
Seeing a room full of mirrors, suggesting self-reflection and introspection.
And I don’t know what to say
Expressing uncertainty and a lack of words to articulate feelings.
Cuz I don’t know to change
Feeling unsure about how to bring about change.
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