four am
Four AM Reflections: Love Lost and Loneliness in Leah Capelle's Melody
Lyrics
At dawn I found a silver hair cascading from my head
Reflecting on the aging process, discovering a silver hair at dawn.
Pulled it out, I took a breath and then pictured us both dead
Expressing a moment of contemplating mortality after finding the silver hair.
My fingers grip ceramic sink, blood drips from my teeth
Physical reaction to the intense emotions, gripping the sink with blood dripping from teeth.
As I think of bumping into you at the store or at the beach
Imagining awkward encounters with the person, emphasizing discomfort.
Maybe I'll write you a note -
Considering the possibility of communicating feelings through writing.
Maybe I won't - I can't tell you what I hate you for
Expressing uncertainty about articulating reasons for resentment.
Cause baby, you'll never come home -
Acknowledging the absence of a loved one who will not return.
You'd rather be alone - I can't tell you what I hate you for
Highlighting the choice of solitude over companionship.
But I hate that you don't love me anymore.
Expressing sorrow for the loss of love and the difficulty in pinpointing reasons.
It's four am, I'm restless and clawing at the sheets
Describing restlessness and emotional turmoil at four am.
Almost forgot the shape you'd take when drifting off to sleep
Recalling the fading memory of the loved one's physical presence during sleep.
The feeling of your hand in mine is fading with the siren calls
Expressing the diminishing sensation of physical connection with the person.
But the ambulance must've missed my house
Speculating on the absence of rescue or emotional support during a crisis.
cause I'm not alive at all, I'm not alive at all.
Conveying a sense of emotional numbness or detachment from life.
So maybe I'll write you a note -
Revisiting the idea of expressing emotions through writing.
Maybe I won't - I can't tell you what I hate you for
Reiterating difficulty in articulating reasons for resentment.
Cause baby, you'll never come home -
Emphasizing the permanence of the loved one's absence.
You'd rather be alone - I can't tell you what I hate you for
Highlighting the preference for solitude over companionship.
But you don't love me anymore (I hate that you don't love me)
Expressing pain and frustration over the lack of love from the person.
You don't love me anymore (I hate that you don't love me)
Repeating the theme of unreciprocated love.
You don't love me anymore (I hate that you don't love me)
-You don't love me anymore (I hate that you don't love me)
-And I hate that you don't love me anymore
Reiterating the pain of not being loved by the person anymore.
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