Lyrics
I wrote the book on disconnecting from the world when I'm afraid
I authored a guide on isolating myself when fear arises.
I camouflage all my emotions like you taught me yesterday
I conceal my feelings as instructed by you in the past.
Sometimes I picture us together like a family would've been
At times, I imagine a life together resembling a family that never materialized.
I lock my house from all my nightmares but the walls are paper thin
Despite securing my home from nightmares, the defenses are fragile.
(Hide away the pain) Cover up the bruises
(Hide away the pain) Conceal the emotional distress.
(Take away the shame) They won't know what truth is
(Take away the shame) Prevent others from knowing the truth.
(Break away the frame) Buried inside these halls…these castle walls
(Break away the frame) Trapped within these castle walls, seeking liberation.
I'm not afraid of the monsters under my bed
I don't fear literal monsters beneath my bed.
I'm more afraid of the voices in my head
I fear the unsettling voices in my mind.
I bet not even the monsters could do what you did
Suggesting that even monsters might not commit the deeds you did.
Goosebumps on the back of my neck stand
Physical reaction to fear: goosebumps.
Anxiety written on the palms of my wet hands
Anxiety evident through sweaty palms.
Wake up to the rage and desperation
Starting the day with anger and desperation.
Hide my head from the blows of frustration
Shielding myself from the blows of frustration.
(Hide away the pain) Cover up the bruises
(Hide away the pain) Concealing pain persists.
(Take away the shame) They won't know what truth is
(Take away the shame) Keeping the truth hidden.
(Break away the frame) Buried inside these halls…these castle walls
(Break away the frame) Trapped within walls, seeking release.
(Hide away the pain) Memories like daggers
(Hide away the pain) Painful memories likened to daggers.
(Take away the shame) They won't find what matters
(Take away the shame) The essential truth remains elusive.
Little child so small builds castle walls…
A vulnerable child builds emotional defenses like castle walls.
I'm not afraid of the monsters under my bed
I'm not scared of literal monsters under the bed.
I'm more afraid of the voices in my head
Fear is directed more towards the internal voices.
I bet not even the monsters could do what you did.
Proposing that even monsters wouldn't replicate your actions.
Memories like daggers
Recurrence of memories likened to piercing daggers.
They won't find what matters
What truly matters remains hidden.
Little child so small…
A portrayal of a small, innocent child building emotional defenses.
I'm not afraid of the monsters under my bed
I don't fear literal monsters under the bed.
I'm more afraid of the voices in my head
Fear is directed more towards the internal voices.
I bet not even the monsters could do what you did
Suggesting that even monsters might not commit the deeds you did.
Monsters!
Reiteration of the presence of monsters, possibly metaphorical.
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