harder than it has to be
Navigating Life's Turbulence: Majoraeclipse's Reflection on Struggle and Growth
Lyrics
I think I make it harder than it has to be
I tend to complicate things more than necessary.
Cuz I never seem to follow what'd be best for me
I often deviate from choices that would benefit me.
And in some regard I feel I'm lacking empathy
I sense a lack of understanding and compassion in myself.
I ain't ever see what everyone expect from me, woah
I haven't fulfilled societal expectations placed on me.
I'll be growing up eventually
Though I'll mature with time.
I'm just scared that everything will change drastically
Fearful of significant changes in my life.
And I'll worry about every single step of me
Anxiety about each step I take.
The only thing I ever wanted was serenity
I sought only peace and tranquility.
I guess I feel alone, but it's okay or not, fuck
Despite feeling alone, I accept it, perhaps reluctantly.
I think I have a tendency to quickly giving up
Tendency to give up too quickly.
I think I have a tendency to ruin what I touch
I ruin what I involve myself in, at least for my own perspective.
At least for myself
Self-awareness of destructive tendencies.
I always say just wait a week, or month
Procrastination with the hope that changes will come.
And so the seasons pass and the changes never come
Time passes, but changes are elusive.
I feel like I've been so caught up guessing other people's thoughts
Too absorbed in deciphering others' thoughts to hear my own.
That it's hard to hear my own for once
Difficulty in recognizing my own thoughts.
(Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh)
Refrain (melodic interlude).
(Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh)
-And everywhere I go, all these worries are near
Constant worries accompany me everywhere.
What if it will stop, what comes after the fear?
Anxiety about what follows after overcoming fear.
And I feel so cold, I just wish you were here
Feeling emotionally distant, longing for someone's presence.
Yeah, I know
Acknowledgment of emotional state.
That I should really stop talking down on myself
Recognizing the need to stop self-deprecating language.
I wish that I could see myself like everyone else
Desire to see oneself positively as others do.
I wish I wasn't certain that there's nothing that helps
Struggling with the certainty that nothing helps.
I just wanna go home
Longing for a sense of belonging and comfort.
And this is for the past me: don't keep thinking all these pieces fall to place when you're eighteen
A message to the past self, advising patience in life's pieces falling into place.
All this never matters 'til my heart starts racing
Things only matter when my heart is in turmoil.
I swear that I'm trying, say you ain't gon' hate me
A pledge to try, hoping not to be disliked.
Please don't
An appeal not to hate.
Why is it so hard if it's all for the better?
Questioning the difficulty of positive change.
I miss having the feeling I could wait 'til forever
Missing the feeling of endless time.
And I don't wanna care anymore
Expressing a desire to stop caring.
I don't know who I do this for if I never put myself in the center, yeah
Uncertainty about the motivation behind one's actions.
(Oh-oh-oh, oh-oh)
Refrain (melodic interlude).
Comment