Ghosts
Lonely Deals and Ghostly Friends: Mallory Merk's Haunting Reflection
Lyrics
Unfamiliar faces, can't see through the smoke in my kitchen
Feeling surrounded by unfamiliar people, obscured by smoke in the kitchen.
And I'm thinkin' of ditchin' this place
Contemplating leaving the current place or situation.
Are these people, lightin' up my room just by leavin'
Wondering if the presence of certain individuals brightens the room.
Probably with something backward
Suspecting that these individuals might be using something unconventional.
Would you take my sorrow with you?
Asking if they would take away the emotional burden or pain.
And if it wasn't for the money, I know you would've probably left me by now
Acknowledging that financial considerations might be the only reason the relationship persists.
And if I wasn't lonely, I know I would've kicked you out myself
Recognizing personal loneliness as a factor preventing self-initiated separation.
And my vision's blurry, I can't see the curse I had
Expressing difficulty in seeing the negative impact of the relationship.
But I wish I wasn't lonely, I know I would've kicked you out
Expressing a desire to be free from loneliness and end the relationship.
I know I would've kicked you out
Reiterating the intention to end the relationship if not for loneliness.
Rather be alone than around a bunch of clones that remind me
Preferring solitude over being with people who resemble disliked aspects of oneself.
Of all the parts about me, that I hate
Mentioning a dislike for certain traits or characteristics within oneself.
Don't pick up my phone, I'm down a rabbithole with some old friends
Choosing isolation, avoiding interaction by being engrossed in old friendships.
Who know how to ghost me, by the end of the high
Noting the tendency of these friends to ignore or "ghost" after spending time together.
But they'll be back again
Anticipating the return of these friends despite their intermittent absence.
I press my luck, makin' deals with my demons
Taking risks and bargaining with personal struggles or challenges.
And they had their fun but the scales are uneven
Reflecting on the consequences of dealing with personal demons.
And if it wasn't for the money, I know you would've probably left me by now
Reiterating the financial aspect as a crucial factor in maintaining the relationship.
And if I wasn't lonely, I know I would've kicked you out myself
Linking personal loneliness to a reluctance to end the relationship.
And my vision's blurry, I can't see the curse I had
Expressing difficulty in recognizing the negative impact of the relationship.
But I wish I wasn't lonely, I know I would've kicked you out
Expressing a wish to overcome loneliness and end the relationship.
I know I would've kicked you out
Reiterating the intention to end the relationship if not for loneliness.
Kicked you out
Finalizing the decision to "kick out" the other person.
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