Walking Ghost Phase
Surviving Shadows: Saint Sleep's Struggle with Self-Destruction
Lyrics
How much pressure does it take to make a fucking diamond break
Reflecting on the immense pressure needed to break a diamond, metaphorically expressing the challenges and stress faced.
Filling up a resume with all the situations where I ruined everything
List-making of personal failures and regretful situations to fill a resume, highlighting a sense of self-awareness and accountability.
But every day a struggle just to get up be productive
Describing the daily struggle to find motivation and be productive.
So seductive just to get reduced to nothing
Expressing the allure of self-destructive behaviors that lead to feeling reduced or diminished.
I just wanna double down on words unspoken
Desiring to emphasize unspoken feelings and thoughts.
Love to be destructive self-sabotaging
Expressing a tendency to engage in self-sabotaging behaviors and finding them appealing.
Crawling out my coffin with my chest all hollowed out
Imagery of emerging from a metaphorical coffin with a sense of emptiness or hollowness.
I'm falling down crawling on the ground
Describing a state of falling and crawling on the ground, possibly indicating emotional or psychological struggles.
Just to see the people that pretend to love me throwing dirt on top
Expressing the pain of witnessing insincere affection from people who pretend to love, adding insult to injury.
Getting harder just to say goodbye
Conveying the increasing difficulty of saying goodbye, suggesting emotional attachment or reluctance.
I've been rotting yet I'm still alive
Acknowledging personal decay or deterioration despite being physically alive.
Everybody asking yes I'm fine
Responding affirmatively to inquiries about well-being while hinting at a concealed struggle.
But it's getting hard to keep that lie
Admitting the challenge of maintaining a facade of well-being becomes more difficult over time.
Getting harder just to say goodbye
Repeating the increasing difficulty of parting ways, reinforcing the theme of attachment.
I've been rotting yet I'm still alive
Reiterating the juxtaposition of physical decay with an enduring existence.
Everybody asking yes I'm fine
Reaffirming well-being when asked, but hinting at internal struggles becoming harder to conceal.
But it's getting hard to keep that lie
Continuing the theme of internal struggle becoming more challenging to hide from others.
Done pretending that I'm something
Rejecting the act of pretending to be something desirable or lovable.
Something worth loving
Rejecting the notion of being inherently worth loving.
Something you can put your trust in
Challenging the idea of being someone trustworthy and dependable.
Something that just doesn't make you sick
Rejecting the image of oneself as something positive or beneficial to others.
See your hair it's falling out in clumps
Describing physical deterioration, possibly as a manifestation of internal struggles.
Should've known those scars they turn to bumps
Reflecting on scars and their transformation, possibly indicating healing or resilience.
Radiation sickness ain't enough
Referencing radiation sickness as a metaphor for enduring difficult experiences.
I deserve a punishment for happy thoughts
Expressing a feeling of deserving punishment for experiencing moments of happiness.
I can't take it anymore
Reaching a breaking point, unable to endure the current circumstances.
Getting harder just to say goodbye
Repeating the increasing difficulty of bidding farewell, emphasizing the emotional weight.
I've been rotting yet I'm still alive
Reiterating the contradiction of physical decay coexisting with continued existence.
Everybody asking yes I'm fine
Responding affirmatively to inquiries about well-being, but with a sense of internal struggle.
But it's getting hard to keep that lie
Acknowledging the growing challenge of maintaining a facade of well-being.
Getting harder just to say goodbye
Repeating the theme of increasing difficulty in saying goodbye, underscoring emotional attachment.
I've been rotting yet I'm still alive
Reiterating personal decay and the paradox of being physically alive despite internal struggles.
Everybody asking yes I'm fine
Reaffirming well-being when asked, but with an undertone of concealed internal battles.
But it's getting hard to keep that lie
Concluding with the acknowledgment that maintaining a facade becomes increasingly challenging over time.
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