Lyrics
It's been a long year
Reflecting on a lengthy period of time
Collecting all the things that make me feel
Gathering items that evoke emotions
A magazine
Comparing life to a magazine, moments often depicted unrealistically
Pictures of moments that aren't real
Photographs capturing moments that don't feel authentic
The furniture
Arranging furniture outside in preparation for sale
Carried to the yard laid in a line
Childhood possessions laid out for sale
My childhood barbies
Barbie dolls from childhood adorned with neon stickers
Neon stickers making them not mine
Alterations made to childhood items, feeling a lack of ownership
And I'm trying to leave it all on a plastic table
Struggling to let go of sentimental items
Dreaming that somehow this will make me able
Hoping selling possessions will bring emotional strength
To not need it anymore, to not need it anymore
Desiring to break free from emotional attachments
A holiday
Comparing a holiday to passing time
Passes by like rain into a lake
Time passing by, likened to rain merging into a lake
And you're in Memphis
Thinking about someone being in a distant place, making new connections
Laughing with the friends I knew you'd make
Knowing someone will thrive in new social circles
It's not the time
Understanding it's not about the timing
It's not that you would leave without a fight
Realizing it's not about leaving without a struggle
It's that I need you
Feeling dependent on someone in dreams
A slave to you in dreams I see at night
Reading books meant for shared spaces, trying to cope
And I'm reading all the books we bought for the coffee table
Hoping reading can alleviate emotional dependency
Dreaming that somehow this will make me able
Struggling to detach emotionally from someone
To not need you anymore, to not need you anymore
Hoping to find independence from emotional ties
And I know that this shit is getting old
Recognizing the prolonged nature of the emotional struggle
And we're both tired of me not letting go
Awareness of the fatigue in holding onto past emotions
But I keep thinking of the pictures that I wish I had
Regretting selling photographs that hold sentimental value
Wish I hadn't sold
Wishing for the retention of meaningful memories
And I'm trying to leave it all on a plastic table
Attempting to let go of emotional baggage
Dreaming that somehow this will make me
Hoping for emotional relief through letting go
I'm trying to leave it all on a plastic table
Continued effort to release emotional attachments
Dreaming that somehow this will make me able
Desiring the strength to break free emotionally
To not need you anymore, to not need you anymore
A yearning to no longer be emotionally dependent
Oh, to not need you
Expressing the desire to be free from emotional neediness
Oh, to not need you
Reiterating the desire for emotional independence
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