Battle Graduate
Child Soldier's Struggle: Internalizing the Art of War
Lyrics
Try the best strategy of which you can think
Encouragement to employ the best strategic thinking in a battle.
In battleship you want the ships to sink
Desire for the opponent's ships to sink in a battleship game.
But only if you feel the need to win
Winning is the sole motivation for sinking ships.
Care to take the simulator for a spin against me?
Invitation to engage in a simulator battle against the speaker.
When I was a little boy
Reflecting on childhood memories of playing with a brother named Peter.
I used to play with my brother Peter
Recalling a negative incident of lashing out and receiving military toys.
'Til I lashed out in retaliation
The military's response to the speaker's aggressive behavior.
And the military gave me some new toys
The speaker, at thirteen, feeling obligated to follow the orders from authorities.
I'm thirteen years old with nothing to prove
Submission to surveillance ("eye in the sky") and lack of personal agency.
A slave to the eye in the sky
A realization about the unconscious desires of a killer.
And as far as I can realize
A deep breath and a reflection on a past victory.
A killer's unconscious desire
Claiming victory due to internalizing the strategies of war.
Breathing deeply
A reference to a victorious feeling, possibly after a battle.
I lean forward in the chair
Physical posture and confidence in winning battles.
I think I've won this fight before
The speaker's belief in having mastered the "art of war."
Cause I've internalized the art of war
Monsters (inner demons) acknowledging the speaker's victory.
Monsters tell me it's a victory
Desolation and destruction as far as the eye can see.
Nothing left as far as the eye can see
Reference to breaking rules, possibly from the Ender's Game book.
Insane child tries to break
Claiming understanding of a hive mind and commanding destruction.
The rules to Ender's game
The speaker acknowledges being deceived and burdened by guilt.
Only I understand the hive mind
The speaker's compassion leading to the downfall of others.
I command the buggers to die
An offer of advice to find a way to end a conflict when feeling overwhelmed.
Were you surprised I let them fool me?
The responsibility of a general to make decisive calls in battle.
In guilt for the rest of my life
Seizing opportunities to destroy an opponent's home.
My compassion is your demise
The irreversible consequences of issuing destructive orders.
And when you feel that you can't keep on fighting any longer
Reflection on the loss of innocence and the gravity of decisions made.
You can always find a way to end the fight
The speaker's commitment to fighting and destroying adversaries.
The general calls the shot alone
The acknowledgment of the speaker's role in dehumanizing actions.
When you have the chance to destroy the alien's home
Claiming the power and authority to decide the fate of others.
When you make the order
The irreversible nature of certain decisions and the loss of innocence.
You can never be a kid again
Reiteration of being thirteen with a focus on combat actions.
I'm thirteen years old with nothing to do
A connection between the speaker's actions and the genocide of humanity.
But blast the buggers out of the sky
A claim to possess the authority and power of God in deciding fates.
The genocide of my humanity
Self-awareness of the burden of responsibility and consequences.
But the hand of God is mine
An acknowledgment of personal responsibility for choices and actions.
Only I can feel the strings attached
A reflection on the heavy burden carried by the speaker.
I got the weight of the world on my back
A contemplation on whether awareness would alter past actions.
If I had known would I have still attacked?
The weight of responsibility and the absence of external assistance.
I got a thousand years to contemplate that fact
An acknowledgment that no external help will alleviate the burden.
Nobody will ever help you
The isolation and internal struggle of the speaker.
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