Memoirs
Embracing Despair: This Is Hell's Memoirs Unveiled
Lyrics
Frustrated by failure, failure to communicate
Frustration due to a failure to communicate.
I just want to give up throw in the towel, let it all slip away
Expressing a desire to give up and let everything slip away.
Every things become a filthy version of what it once was
Things have deteriorated into a filthy version of their former selves.
I'm disgusted by my waning passion and my embrace for guilt
Disgust with waning passion and an acceptance of guilt.
Retrospect brings regret
Regret and reflection on past actions.
But for now I'm shutting it all out
Choosing to shut out negative thoughts for the moment.
Just expect nothing less
Expecting nothing less than self-loathing and doubt.
To be filled with self loathing and doubt
Anticipating a feeling of self-loathing and doubt.
This potent sting of remorse is killing me because
Intense remorse is causing internal distress.
Retrospect brings regret
Continued regret upon reflection.
From now on I'm shutting it all out
Deciding to shut out negative thoughts from now on.
I guess I lied when I said I'd die trying
Admitting a failure to live up to a commitment.
So it would seem that I'm better off lying
Acknowledging a preference for falsehood over struggle.
In a pool of misery in the nearest reaches
Being immersed in misery and despair.
Of despair because I've reached rock bottom
Feeling at the lowest point.
Clutching memories making sure I've got them
Clutching onto memories even at rock bottom.
And if nothing more I'll take them to my fucking grave
Willing to take memories to the grave.
I've given all I can and I can't give anymore
Having given all, unable to give more.
Been screaming "fuck!" for so long my throat is blood and raw
Expression of frustration and exhaustion.
And letting it slip away is something that I thought I'd never do
Surprised by letting things slip away despite initial intentions.
Looking back at the photographs to see
Reflecting on past photographs to understand changes.
The difference was in my eyes
Noticing a difference in the eyes, indicating lost intensity.
I must have lost something along the way,
Realizing a loss of something crucial along the way.
Used to turn anger to drive
Used to channel anger into motivation.
But my eyes are open to reality
Seeing reality with open eyes.
I'm through asking questions like "why me?"
No longer questioning the reasons for challenges.
I'm fucking done and I'm admitting defeat
Admitting defeat and ending the struggle.
And I wouldn't have it any other way
Accepting defeat without regrets.
I wouldn't have it any other way, no one else can control me
Embracing self-control and independence.
And when I looked back I realized the difference was in my eyes
Realizing the difference in perspective through hindsight.
And now that I've come to terms with the relentlessness of misery
Coming to terms with the relentless nature of misery.
And recaptured the urgent feelings of despair
Regaining a sense of urgency in facing despair.
I feel whole again, whole again in the emptiness
Feeling complete in the emptiness.
And that is something I will both despise and cherish.
Simultaneously despising and cherishing newfound completeness.
With every fiber of my being
Expressing deep emotion with every fiber of being.
Coming to terms with the misery
Acceptance of misery as part of life.
Coming to terms with the relentlessness
Acknowledging the relentlessness of challenges.
And that's something I will despise
Expressing disdain for enduring challenges.
With every fiber of my being
Embracing misery as an integral part of existence.
Coming to terms with the misery
Acknowledging the relentlessness of challenges.
Coming to terms with the relentlessness
Expressing disdain for enduring challenges.
And that's something I will cherish
Cherishing the acceptance of challenges.
And I'll do it with the greatest sincerity
Committing to facing challenges with sincerity.
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