Lyrics
I remember losing sleep almost every single night
Expressing a memory of frequent sleep disturbances due to emotional distress.
Cause I was always waking up from choking on your lies
Referencing past experiences of awakening disturbed by lies, suggesting a lack of trust.
For hours I would trace your silhouette there in the dark
Describing the act of contemplating the person's presence in the darkness.
Knowing I would never know the truth of who you really are
Acknowledging the uncertainty about the true nature of the person being thought about.
Now I'm trying to get over you, but where do I begin
Expressing the difficulty of moving on and seeking a starting point for recovery.
You painted yourself so picture perfect, so I dropped my guard and I let you in
Reflecting on vulnerability after being deceived by someone who appeared perfect.
I did this to myself, and I can't believe I was so dumb
Admitting responsibility for the situation and expressing self-realization.
How can I still feel all this pain when I'm completely numb
Questioning the persistence of emotional pain despite feeling emotionally numb.
And now I wonder if he knows that you're just sleeping with my ghost
Suspecting that the person is involved with someone else, possibly unaware of the emotional impact.
And that you'll disappear into thin air the moment he needs you most
Anticipating the person's potential abandonment when needed the most.
Have you ever turned around to see the trail of broken hearts you leave
Pondering the aftermath of the person's actions on others, referencing broken hearts.
The poison you left in me still grows and I can't find the fucking antidote
Describing the lingering effects of emotional poison left by the person.
I can't find the fucking antidote, and I can't find the antidote
Reiterating the inability to find a solution or relief from the emotional pain.
Will I ever find the antidote? But now you're gone and I will never know
Expressing the permanent uncertainty resulting from the person's departure.
Now I'm trying to get over you, but tell me where do I begin
Repeating the struggle to move on and seeking guidance on where to start.
You painted yourself so picture perfect, so I dropped my guard and I let you in
Recalling vulnerability after being deceived by an apparently perfect facade.
And I did this to myself, I can't believe I was so blind
Acknowledging personal responsibility and expressing disbelief at past naivety.
I thought you were my everything, but you were never really mine
Realizing that the person was never truly what was believed.
Were you ever really mine
Posing a rhetorical question about the person's genuine connection.
You were never really mine
Affirming that the person was never genuinely possessed or belonged.
You were never really mine
Reiterating the realization that the person was never truly owned or part of one's life.
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