My Next Lover
Love and Loss: Navigating Life Beyond Grief
Lyrics
You watched me age 19
You observed me reaching the age of 19
Bury my dad
I experienced the burial of my father
And you asked for his permission to become my wife
You sought my father's approval to marry me
The day before he died
This request happened on the day before his death
And he'll never know my next lover
My father will never be aware of my future romantic partner
No he'll never know my next lover
-No he'll never know my next lover
-Coffee and cigarettes back when I took part in neither
Refers to a past time involving coffee and cigarettes
Too young to understand but look at me now
Despite being young, I didn't partake in coffee and cigarettes
Pinot in a can in one hand
Describes current behavior with a can of Pinot and a cigarette, using self-harm to cope with emotional pain
Cigarette in the other
-Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you lover
-I don't want to deal with death
I don't want to confront or cope with death
I don't want to shake his hand anymore
I no longer want to face the reality of death
He took you from me way too soon
Death took you away prematurely
And I don't want to deal with death
I don't want to deal with the concept of death
When did you fall out of love
Asking when the loss of love occurred
Do you remember the first time you looked at me
Recalling the moment you stopped feeling love
And didn't feel anything
The first time you looked at me without emotion
Did it happen overnight or did it slowly seep in
Questioning if the change happened suddenly or gradually
Coffee and cigarettes back when I took part in neither
Similar to lines 10-14, depicting current struggles with vices and self-harm
Too young to truly understand but look at me now
-Pinot in a can in one hand, cigarette in the other
-Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you lover
-Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you lover
Repetition emphasizing the coping mechanism of self-harm
Putting it out on my arm because that hurts less than you
-They both left a scar
Both past relationships left scars, but the pain was less than the current emotional distress
But that hurt less than you
-And they both left a scar
-But that hurt less than you
-And they both left a scar
-But that hurt less than you
-And they both left a scar
-But that hurt less than you
The scars from past relationships hurt less than the current emotional pain
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