I wanted to hate you.

Emotional Turbulence: Unraveling the Complex Depths of 'I Wanted to Hate You' by BR14N
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Lyrics

Wanted to hate you

Expressing a desire or intention to feel resentment towards someone.

The world goes by but mine comes to a stop

Feeling a sense of personal stagnation or emotional pause while the rest of the world continues.

My memory is being overloaded by you

Experiencing an overwhelming impact on memory caused by thoughts of the person.

And from the calculations I had never thought

Unexpected emotional outcomes contrary to previous expectations or calculations.

That this is what I would've had to go through

Reflecting on the unforeseen challenges and emotions resulting from the relationship.

I wanna see you stay

Expressing a desire for the person to remain in one's life.

But I know you don't look at me the same

Awareness of the disparity in feelings, understanding that the other person doesn't reciprocate in the same way.

And now I'm watching you walking away

Observing the painful act of the person walking away from the relationship.

It hurts to get up so I'll just lie in the rain

Choosing to remain in a state of emotional pain, metaphorically lying in the rain.

I wanted to hate you

Reiterating the initial desire or intention to harbor negative feelings.

I know it's selfish but I can't find a way

Acknowledging a sense of selfishness in being unable to find a way to stop thinking about the person.

To stop thinkin' about you

Struggling to cease thoughts about the person and their actions.

The things you do and the things you say

Reflecting on the impact of the person's actions and words.

You left me lying here

Feeling abandoned or left behind by the person.

I ask myself if you know just what you did

Questioning whether the person is aware of the consequences of their actions.

And what you didn't

Contemplating both the actions taken and those neglected by the person.

As you fade I wonder what it meant

Wondering about the significance of the person fading away from the speaker's life.

My mind's a mess and all the programs freeze

Describing the mental state as chaotic and experiencing a freeze in emotional responses.

This heart that made me I the pain and O the tears

Metaphorically expressing the emotional pain with reference to a program error.

And now there's errors in my .exe's

Noting disturbances or mistakes in personal experiences or emotions.

I think a power off is what I need

Suggesting a need for emotional shutdown or detachment.

I wanted to see you stay

Repeating the desire to see the person stay in the speaker's life.

But I knew you didn't look at me the same

Recognizing the lack of mutual feelings from the person.

And all I did was watch you walk away

Recalling the painful act of watching the person walk away.

It hurt to get up so I just lied in the rain

Choosing to remain in emotional pain, symbolically lying in the rain.

I wanted to hate you (wanted to hate you)

Reiteration of the initial desire or intention to harbor negative feelings.

I know it's selfish but I can't find a way

Reaffirming the selfish struggle to stop thinking about the person.

To stop thinkin' about you (thinkin' about you)

Continuing to grapple with persistent thoughts about the person and their actions.

The things you do and the things you say

Reflecting on the impact of the person's actions and words.

You left me lying here (left me lying here)

Reiterating the feeling of abandonment or being left behind by the person.

I ask myself if you know just what you did

Questioning whether the person is aware of the consequences of their actions.

And what you didn't

Contemplating both the actions taken and those neglected by the person.

As you fade I wonder what it meant

Wondering about the significance of the person fading away from the speaker's life.

I wanted to hate you

Reiteration of the initial desire or intention to harbor negative feelings.

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