2009
Navigating 2009: A Musical Odyssey of Self-Discovery and Struggle
Lyrics
Internal fixation on your
Feeling intensely focused on internal thoughts and concerns
External invasion
Sense of being invaded or affected by external forces
I'm all alone
Expressing a state of solitude
It's not my home
Feeling that the current place is not where one truly belongs
Waiting on another day
Anticipating the arrival of a future day
To finish what I started
Desire to complete something previously initiated
All those years ago
Reflecting on past years and experiences
I thought I'd grown
Belief in personal growth and maturity
Hang ten on this wave of panic
Facing a wave of panic and anxiety
Some folks would call it romantic
Recognizing panic as a possibly romanticized experience by some
Hoping I can seem sincere
Hoping to convey sincerity despite external appearances
Behind all of this plastic
Reference to a superficial or artificial layer
And the hanging loose of all my friends
Feeling detached from friends and their carefree attitude
Helps the panic to set in
Friendship exacerbating feelings of panic
I feel all alone
Reiterating a sense of loneliness
Surrounded by the alerts on my phone
Surrounded by notifications on the phone, potentially overwhelming
And all my songs sound like a shitty band from 2009
Expressing dissatisfaction with current creative output
I am sorry Sloan
Apology to someone named Sloan for perceived shortcomings
I thought I'd grown
Repeating the theme of personal growth and maturity
Making music for my adolescent self to fall in love with
Creating music with the intention of resonating with one's younger self
I'm behind our times
Admitting to being behind the times in terms of trends
But I'm trying
Expressing effort despite challenges
I'm trying my best
Reiterating the commitment to trying one's best
But I can't rest till I'm satisfied
Unable to find satisfaction or peace until personal goals are achieved
So I get dressed kinda
Preparing oneself for the day, possibly with mixed feelings
And try to find a way to keep it up
Struggling to maintain a certain facade
Treat myself like I'm enough
Encouraging self-acceptance and self-worth
Fight the urge to drop my classes
Resisting the temptation to give up on responsibilities
Spend my extra time in practice
Devoting extra time to improve skills through practice
Get diagnosed
Mention of a medical diagnosis, possibly related to mental health
With what I'm predisposed
Referring to a predisposition to certain conditions
Never leave my house again
Extreme reaction to a diagnosis, contemplating isolation
And feel the fear kick in
Feeling fear intensify while staying indoors
And I can see the stories now
Anticipating negative narratives or judgments from others
It's funny how
Reflecting on the ironic or humorous aspects of the situation
I'm trying my best
Reaffirming the dedication to giving one's best effort
But I can't rest till I'm satisfied
Continued restlessness until personal satisfaction is achieved
So I get dressed kinda
Repeating the process of getting dressed and facing the day
And try to find a way to keep it up
Striving to maintain a positive self-perception
Treat myself like I'm enough
Emphasizing the importance of self-acceptance and self-worth
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