Lyrics
All the way off in the distance,
There's a distant feeling, a part of me resists something.
a part of me still wanted to resist this.
Despite resistance, a part of me still feels compelled.
For no reason talking bout the same things at the same time,
Repetitive discussions about undesired topics simultaneously.
wanted to express how the undesired shine.
Desire to articulate feeling overshadowed by unwanted attention or focus.
It seems like I can't catch a break and every day the same mistakes,
Constantly making the same mistakes, unable to catch a break.
for no one else, the pressure builds and builds, til we can't even breathe.
Feeling pressure building up, suffocating.
Til we can't even breath, in water where we're meant to sleep.
Metaphorically drowning in a situation meant for rest.
The structure that we couldn't see, like a chain around your mind,
Unseen constraints affecting thoughts, causing withdrawal.
it put me into retreat.
Feeling confined or restricted mentally.
Break down, another pill another compound,
Emotional breakdown, resorting to more medication.
another chain around your neck now,
Medication becoming an additional burden or restraint.
all the way up just to forget how.
Using substances to forget or escape.
Slow, I'm on new medication,
Starting a new medication regimen.
I don't think I'll see you soon.
Uncertain about meeting someone soon due to medication.
And so, I don't need my medication to understand
Belief in understanding without medication and making things vanish.
how to make things disappear.
Having control over making things disappear without medication.
A long walk through the snow now,
Walking through difficulty (symbolized by snow) toward medical help.
all the way down to the hospital.
Reaching the hospital after a challenging journey.
The waters coming in slowly,
Anxiety or pressure gradually increasing.
the pills the try to control me.
Medication attempting to control the situation.
Last summer in the psych ward I couldn't get out
Past experience in a psychiatric ward, feeling trapped.
had me sitting in a gown with my foot in my mouth
Feeling confined and unable to express oneself.
I lied to the doctors IO lied to my mom
Deception towards medical professionals and family.
so I could go home and just
Wanting to return home, even through deception.
Break down, another pill another compound,
Repeating the cycle of breakdown and medication.
another chain around your neck now,
Medication adding further restraint or burden.
all the way up just to forget how.
Using substances to forget or escape, continuing the cycle.
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